Welp, here it is, the inaugural post for our wonderful dvd review blog! Okay, yes…it does seem superfluous…but who cares, right? My fiance, Dan, and I have amassed an ENORMOUS dvd collection over the last ten years. The collection numbers well over 600, now, and, I’m ashamed to say, I haven’t even watched all the movies I own! Some of the dvds even still have saran wrap on them!
As we counted up these films, scattered all across the floor in alphabetical order, some of which I’d never cracked open, Dan kept shooting me sidelong glances as I felt more and more sheepish. Not only that, but there are some movies in there that I positively BEGGED for him to let me buy (*couDeadwood Season 2gh*) that are still sealed. I mean, he loves me…or at the very least is rather fond of me. He likes to buy things for me that I want…but the more things I want but don’t seem to actually want, the less he’s going to give into me…and that just cannot happen, am I right, people?!
As he started into a diatribe about my wastefulness and greed (I assume), I cut him off:
Me: There’s a reason I bought all of them!! I swear!
Dan: Prove it. *picks up A Man Apart* Why did you buy this?
Me: Timothy Olyphant.
Dan: *picks up The Girl Next Door* ?
Me: Timothy Olyphant.
Dan: *points at the sealed second season of Deadwood* ?
Me: *squeaking* Timothy Olyphant…
Dan: *picking up Go* Timothy Olyphant?
Me: Okay, that one actually has merit! It’s funny, and the story is cleverly told, and there are strong, non-stereotypical male homosexual characters.
Dan: *picking up Rockstar and Dreamcatcher*
Me: Timothy Olyphant
Okay, that last part is embellished. I would never own Rockstar OR Dreamcatcher…even sexy Timothy Olyphant isn’t worth that…I do have Die Hard 4 and The Crazies, though.
My point is that I own a crapload of movies, and a good portion of them I own for stupid reasons, but there are few in there that are for a purpose. And what better way for me to justify my obsession with purchasing dvds and blu-rays than by using my amazing talent for journalism as a reviewer for my own personal collection? Yes? Okay…it’s a weak premise…but it gives me something to do on my days off that keeps me out of trouble and away from Judge Alex and Judge Pirro and Divorce Court.
I know that it is a little backwards writing the first post AFTER we’ve already recorded the first podcast…but I’ve never been the type to do thing the normal way…shut up, Dan. I did listen to the premiere podcast episode…and it is pretty pitiful. Dan is great…while I am a bundle of nervous laughter, made up of far too many “ums,” and “yeahs.” I also realize that “winging it” is really not the way to go about this. I can’t spend every episode describing every film as “amazing.” That word is really the foundation that every bad film review is built on.
So how am I going to solve this, you ask? I intend to write my blog reviews PRIOR to recording the podcasts. That means that I will be forced to keep up with my reviews, otherwise I will not get to enjoy the fun that recording offers. Also, I will have a rough outline of why exactly I bought a particular movie, and why I like it so much, and I will not have to spend the entire podcast hemming and hawing about why it’s “amazing.” Dan may be writing a few blog entries, if the mood strikes him (and if I just do not care about a movie, like Joe’s Apartment *shudder*), but mostly he will probably just be joining me in the podcasts. That means they will be much less critiquing of the movie and much more of a dialogue between the two of us. I’m sure that we’ll find a couple films we do not agree on. I look forward to those episodes. Also, being the masochist that I am, I am hoping I can get a couple other friends who detest certain films (Jason, I’m looking at you), who wouldn’t mind a nice, civilized, healthy debate. We can’t all be madly in love with 50 First Dates.
I hope this blog/podcast is informative. Maybe it will introduce people to some movies they may have otherwise overlooked…afterall…there are a crapton of movies in the world…am I right?!
p.s. Really I’m just using this an excuse to get Dan to watch some movies I’ve been trying to get him to watch for 8 years…you guys are just a pretense…so just go with it, okay?